I woke up excited. It’s as if every sense within me had been awakened. Finally a vision became crystal clear of how to begin a ministry that would reach out to bless and make relationships with those caught in prostitution on the street.
I found myself singing. I couldn’t wait to step out. I was ready to go and wanted to go now.
I know the proper Christian thing would be to tell you I set out, formed a team and got to work on the vision God had birthed within me. It was God-inspired — therefore it had to be time to act. Right?
But that’s not what happened.
That crystal clear vision I had that brought enthusiasm into my soul to reach a dark world was all but shattered within a few hours. Shattered!
I arrived at church ready to worship, serve, and love. I found myself caught up visiting with new people that had come and wondered where my husband had gone. As I turned to find him, I found a woman beside him practically sitting in his lap. It was awkward to say the least!
As husband looks at me with a “help me” stare, I say “Do you know her?” “No,” is his reply. I stand there not knowing the proper way to handle this situation.
The woman never budged, but finally she looks at me as I ask with a smile, “Are you going to sit by my husband?” She stares forever before she gets up to leave.
The vision about died.
There was an air about his woman. I watched as she rubbed my husband’s hand and then proceeded to “take to” every man she came in contact with that day. And while all of that was unnerving it messed me up. After seeing this woman “all over my husband,” telling me she knew him from the beach, my mind went crazy. My vision was zapped. It was gone.
Then the wrestle in my mind begins. I tried to remember the vision and enthusiasm I had that morning when I woke up, but it had all but disappeared. The actions of this one woman had stolen my passion as her actions hit a little too close for comfort. I longed for walls, boundaries, and a safe place.
But there was this nagging question that kept stirring through my soul, “Are you going to love her?” The vision of the morning kept trying to sneak back in there with that question attached, “Are you going to love her?”
Her. She was the girl who God had given me a vision to reach out to. Could I love her?
Visions are worth fighting for.
With every call from God there is a preparation season. There is a time where you will be wrecked in some form or fashion to strengthen your passion and the why of your call. Later — much later — I was thankful for the disturbance in my soul. It was a great reminder that where God calls is not easy, nor comfortable.
Many times the people we want to run from are the very people God wants us to serve. (for more on this be sure to check out Graffiti Study and Do)
To be truthful, I needed to be shattered that morning. I needed to be reminded that where God is calling is a different world where I won’t understand most, but need to love others despite their actions. I need to love the girl who is on the street corner, as much as I need to love that man who put her on the street corner or the one who buys her.
There are many who give up short of their God vision, due to the friction. If your vision is truly from God, then how can you give up? If you say “God gave me this vision,” but yet turn your back on that call a few days later due to inconvenience and awkwardness, how can you expect God to work through you?
I’m not saying, it’s easy. It’s actually a messy journey. But think of Moses and all he had to endure. He had to embrace crazy Pharaoh 10 times over before he was ready to lead people to freedom.
Through the messy, fight for your vision.
The vision God gave you is worth fighting for. I know there will be a struggle. There will be doubts and questions as you move forward, but you can’t turn your back. Fight through every obstacle that tries to hold you back. Your leadership and call are developing.
There’s a beautiful reality of your vision just waiting for you on the other side of your fight. [tweet that]
What does your vision look like? Have you had to fight through obstacles?